Early to work, early home. Got lots of stuff done, got lots of stuff to do.

Driving in the rain with the radio turned down to miss the new car/diamond/grocery/ commercial banter, I tried to be what I want to be when I grow old. A singing song-crazy lady. Thankfully, I was alone, but still managed to embarrass myself...and I heard Puppy was looking for a new routine reporting of our embarrassing moments... Have you ever heard "Proud Mary" sung through the nose? You don't want to, especially when it is my nose. If I plan to be singing my senile days away as my Mom tends to do, I best get lessons or practice a whole lot more, because people will undoubtedly ask me to stop singing. Hopefully, I will be beyond caring. Mom says "Sometimes they ask me to stop singing, and sometime they ask me to start." Regardless, when the dementia sets in I want to be flash-backing down Rock n' Roll Memory Lane...in my wheelchair, doing my best "Electric Lady Land", the Dead's "Sunshine Daydream"("walking through the tall trees, going where the wind blows"),into "Sugar Magnolia", the Door's "Riders On The Storm." I gotta tell you though, that was the worst "Proud Mary" I have ever heard, & it remains a humbling experience.

One of my most embarassing moments was when a guy dumped me at a party for another guy. My room mate & I were the only girls at the party, and ALL the guys were pretty, pretty boys, that I'd have to call friends. But it must've been something with the guy not yet being outta the closet...why would he take me to a party & dump me for another guy, and leave me to call & pay for my own cab ride home? Sometimes, it is so hard to get your head around how some people treat you. How can people be so heartless & cruel? And it just keeps happening, if you let it. You get into a downward spiral and the crappola just keeps hitting the fan...you are like that old comic strip character that walks around with a cloud & constant drizzle over his head, as you stumble from one minor catastrophy to the next.
Then again, other times, you can get on a roll with the positive vibes and there is just no stopping you, not even the folks that you piss off 'cause you're in a good mood. Wierd how that happens, that people get mad at you for enjoying your day...they are most likely in some physical or pyschcological pain, & have no patience with someone who is whistling while they work, but they are definitely the ones who need to snap out of it, not me. Yet there is no polite way to point that out to them, thus I continue to whistle & sing off-key, sometimes just to aggrevate them. If it is the worse thing I ever do to them(& the singing IS bad), we can maybe still have a friendly relationship. I hope.

So, tomorrow is Friday & come quitting time, I will hopefully regain that natural high I have spoken of the last two Fridays. Hopefully, this constant rain will subside-a few small headaches with this front passing through, but nothing that an over-the-counter Tylenol can't handle. I'm glad that I have cut the ties with the Pain Clinic. Today, anyway, I'm glad. No more stick a needle in my eye and charge me 5-Large for the priviledge, whether the pain subsides or not.
Twice.
Mean Jean's(who's not) Grandfather passed away Tues, and Monday, my Brother-in-law's uncle crossed over...and the beat goes on. I am happy to be here, and have quite a few years hopefully, before the dementia starts to kick in full tilt boogie. Bubba & I still laugh a lot, and you can not put a price on the gift of humor. We watch a lot of videos & DVD's, & today enjoyed Charlie Sheen in "Terminal Velocity" again. The dogs are fat & happy, and their mid-life crisis owners are flirting with the same. I know why I have to crash so early these days, but 9:30 pm is so not the me that I spent most of my life being... this must be more of the full circle gig that I have come to take note of. The more things change, the more they remain the same.

Once again, my hero "Earl" has been pre-empted for basketball, and I best get used to it for it is this March Madness trip that has always puzzled me. It's a shame I don't dig basketball, if I did, I'd be digging this month of game after game, after game ,after game. I just don't get the attraction, and, I dunno, it flirts with overkill when they keep Bubba & I from "Earl". Bubba's got his "Stargate" DVDs & I have the Stream, and no good will come of whinning, as we have agreed to get "Earl" on DVD when it becomes available. and I will continue to be spoilt rotten & procrastinating my junk room. Same as it ever was.

Hasta manana me amigos y amigas. Vaya con Dios!

...but they went away, cuz I broke down & went & got Stephen King's "The Cell", and I am still obsessing over it.

Let me see now...something inspiring about music, something nice about a full, busy nice day @ work & skipping out early because of all the rain & the rumors of more rain & bad storms & I wanted to come home & read my book, with my computer on my lap, and not do much of anything, but nibble on celery and chocolate & Lean Cuisine. Something about spoiling the dogs Something about Bubba going over to his Mom's twice & getting called by her twice...his BP is 156/93.yada yada, yada....

Not enough hours in the day...gotta touch base with Luce & Mary Elizabeth, to name but two. Good life, good music, good books, diggin' the Stream...got another story in the works..a memory, but am a lil sick o writing about HP, but do want to tell you about when he took me to an auction in SF where they were auctioning off the personal effects & assets of the people who died in Rev. Jim Jone's People's Temple mass suicide, and who can drink grape Kool-aid ever again after that...not I!

yada, yada, flirt with drivel, flirt with disaster, lots of folks coming to work with the flu, but so far, I just keep on trucki'n like a doo-dah woman.

Not gonna get caught up in anything semi-coherrent tonite...can not put this book down & have almost finished it in 2 daze which is how I treat most of Stephen King's work. Is "Lost" on tonite? they never seem to get anywhere cuz they are lost which aggrevates Bubba, and amuses me, cuz it is kinda like my life, but I'm not worried about it at this point in time, as I have shelter from the storm, and a miracle every day.

Later daze in later ways, Kids. Be good to you. You know I will try to be to me. May you live to see Adam's dawn, and never take it for granted.

OK...NO SPELL CHECK THIS TIME, Scratch just go ahead & make fun of my typos & spelling errors now, cuz I ain't writing this a third time!

Those of you who know &/or recall may remember that out of high school in order to escape Small-town, Indiana I joined the Navy. While in the Navy I met a guy who was a narcissistic, paranoid, physco and didn't see the warning signs & I married the idiot, being the idiot that I was. He got out of the Navy & when my tour of duty ended, he commanded & I allowed him to demand that I get out of the Navy so that he would not "be referred to as a dependent husband" which is the term for a guy married to a girl on active duty. I had 7 yrs in & a great job, but we were married & I allowed him to call the shots. WHen I got out we threw a HUGE party & he took me to Fredrick's of Hollywood & decked me out in satin skin-tight slacks with big bell bottoms(1977, kids, and a silk white blouse really low cut that occasionally the top button unbuttoned itself if I moved around too much. I had(& still have)long blond hair & in those days & for that party wore way too much makeup. Hot Mama! After the party the outfit was dry cleaned & stayed in the plastic for over 2 yrs.

HP & I were both Emergency Medical Technicians(minimal training then for ambulance drivers), but he worked for an Oakland 911 company & I stayed home, Cuz I was supposed to. He didn't trust me to even go out front and get the mail, as all women" were weak, and helplessly submitted themselves for sex to anyone who wanted it"-his way of thinking, not mine.

I was chattel, property, his lil "House Mouse", and I kept the peace at the cost of my own mental health.

Then, he combined his amulance experience with respiratory therapy classes in Berkely(School for me was firbidden as he was sure I would be performing oral sex on my classmates in the "library closet"(?). As he was training to become a Respiratory Therapist, he could get more hands-on expeirience if he went to work for another company that specialized in transport of neo-natal premature babies & super sick kids out in the boonies transferring them to Children's Hosp for a higher level of care, than the boonies could offer. This also meant manning an Air Ambulance as a part of the team that kept the patient alive until the patient was transferred to a more acute care facility. He applied for, and was practically accepted at this other company, but before he started they invited him & his wife to a surprise going-away party for one of the employees going to Paramedic school in LA. tO hP, THIS WAS LIKE A "power party", he felt he would nab the job for sure, if we made a good impression at the party. We were getting ready to go, and as ususal, he was teling me what to wear.(yes)When the phone rang...if he could meet the rest of the team down at Children's Hosp. he could go on his first Air Ambulance "Ride-Along". The manager on the phone said he's get me to the party, where HP could meet up with me later, after the transport. He was on it & gone,while I awaited strangers in a strange ambulance to come pick me up & go to a stranger's party. ("Feel like a Stranger,"indeed). The ambulance pulled up front & this guy I'd never met bounded to my front door, knocked, shook hasnds, introduced himself as "Bruce", then asked if I was ready to go, then strangely, he asked if that was what I was going to wear(tie-dye, of course). He rushed on to exlain that this was a surprise party for Jose & that Jose thought it was just a bunch of guys going together to a topless bar in Fremont(40 mins from my house). He said they needed me to play along and help talk Jose into stopping by his house enroute to the topless bar where Jose's wife & family & friends were waiting with their shouts of "Surprise!" He asked if I had anything sexier than tie-dye, and I told him yeah, but my husband wouldn't like it.
"I'll handle HP" says Bruce, "He really wants this job."

So, I dashed back inside, put on the Fredricks & dashed back out. Bruce helped me into the back of an out-of-service ambulance that had 5 or 6 other stranger-guys in the back, sitting on the gurney, on the floor, on the benc. They were all too quiet & I knew it was Fredrick's influence & for a few minutes it was awkward, but Bruce started babbling his 1/2 baked plan right away. I had to pretend to be a single woman, intrested in Jose & figure a way to get him to stop by his house on the way to the topless joint they really were not going to.
"Just flirt with him & see if you can get him to stop by his house."

"OK...I'll try...."

We picked up Jose after a 20 min drive to the ambulance station where he was just getting off shift. At the last second, I whispered to Bruce to have Jose sit by me on the bench, and acting like a chaffeur, Bruce hops out & wave Jose into the back of the rig with a grand gesture, ""Your chariot awaits," he said.

Jose bounded into the back & stopped, shocked to see me sitting there in silk & satin, a perfectly strange woman. I patted the bench beside me & the boy was not shy & sat right down & introduced himself & turned on the charm. Now this was clearly a married man who did not want to advertise that he was married. He was estatic that I was going with them to the topless bar. I turned the charm right back on him and told him that we were going to meet my room mate there, which also made his very happy. Then, I asked if he partied. The guys were all quiet.

"Cause if you party & Bruce says you do, and if you have some party material at your house & Bruce says you do, I was hoping we could stop & pick some up on the way for me and my room mate" Jose didn't want to stop by his home where he thought only his wife & kids were, and tried to convince me that liquor would suffice at the bar. I put my hand on his knee, and leaned over & told him "My room mate & I love to party...it just makes the both of us crazy...couldn't we stop by really quick & just pick it up and go? Tammy is counting on it & we both want to get crazy." Maybe it was a room mate named Tammy, maybe it was my perfume, maybe it was Fredricks's, but Jose yelled at Mike, the driver to stop by Jose's house real quick cuz he wanted to pick something up on the way. We had to ride another 15 miutes, most of it with my hand on his knee, flirting like the shameless hussy my husband always accused me(and all women)of being.

We got to his house & it was full of wives, realatives, in-laws, kids and friends all shouting"Surprise!"...and he was. I only felt awkward meeting his wife, & don't know to this day if she ever knew just how we got Jose to swing by the house. But everyone was friendly & kind, & complimented my outfit with good-natured "woo-woos" and laughter & I had a great time.

Until HP arrived. When he saw what I wearing, too angrily, and too loudly he shouted at me in front of too many people "Whatda F--k are you wearing?", and Bruce had to dash to my rescue & explain,and even though he was far from at ease with it, he did eventually lighten up a bit for the sake of brown nosing his new boss.

The next week, Bruce called me and said "Hey, aren't you an EMT,too? Why aren't you working? Do you want a job? You've got moxie."

I knew I didn't have moxie. I told him HP had to know where I was, and who I with at at all times ,& so, I didn't work, didn't go to school, but yeah," I'd love a job!"

Says Bruce, "If you are both working here, then he can keep an eye on you, don't you think?"

I'd been in that marriage long enough to know the answer to that one, "It has to be your idea, Bruce, you have to offer me a job through him or he won't go for it at all"

Which Bruce did & it worked like a charm. Several years later, I was assistant manager/dispatcher at the company. HP left that company as he had no fiends there, and everybody was on Cher's side for the seperation & subsequent divorce. they all proved to be an excellent support group for me for years to come.

HP, not so much.
(now I must quicly submit this as is b4 it suffers the fate of the original,..."Premature Deletion

Dude, I missed" NCIS"& "House" to rewrite this, Hope it is OK

Now, Luceeee thinks a blog about my court experience would make a good blog. I am not so sure. It was so complicated, it all took place off Broadway in Oakland (nothing like Off-Broadway in Luucceee's NYC.) The victim was an African-American crackhead hooker as were the 2 girls who at first accused the two African-American Pimp/Crack Dealers of committing the crime. The victim & her 2 friends were partying with their 2 pimp dealers, when all of a sudden, the gentlemen noticed a vast amount of missing partying material. The victim had left the party, but was still hanging around the sleazy hotel attending various other parties in other rooms with the same theme. The defendants searched the 2 remaining girls, found no stash to speak of on them, and left the room, angry, with guns drawn to find the missing party girl. This is where the two ladies's testimony conflicted itself. One day they testified they saw the 2 pimps drag the victim out of another party room & stuff her alive into the trunk of their Caddy. The next day, both ladies were only semi-coherrent, slurring their speech, stumbling about the courtroom, falling asleep in the courtroom and on the stand, & they changed their testimony, saying the defendants had left the party room to look for the victim, but that the ladies themselves saw nothing as they were busy getting high while the guys took off. The victim was found in an empty lot 2 blocks from the No-Tell Motel. it was obvious to 10 out of 12 of us that the ladies had been threatend(one sported new black eye on the day her testimony changed). But the 10 of us were 9 Caucasions and 1 Asian. The dissenting two ladies, coincidently, African-American, refused to vote guilty as the girls' testimony changed, and they each knew of several African-American males who had been wrongly convicted of crimes they did not commit just because of their skin color. Our dissenting 2 jury ladies said if those 2 crackhead hookers had not actually seen the 2 guys apprehend the victim(which is what they said in their new, abridged version), then there was still reasonable doubt. They tried to make us see it their wasy, we 10 tried to make them see it our way (we felt the doubt to be unreasonable & unlikely), and never the twain did meet. And the pimps walked on our hung jury...so frustrating. They never denied being the victim's pimps or dealers. They said they looked for her, but never found her, and there were no witnesses coming forth to contradict their tale of innocence. It took a month to go nowhere & do nothing. I had to work nights at my ambulance compay, and days were spent in the court-room. I have always lived paycheck to paycheck, so I had to do the night shift, or live on $9.45 a day for a month. I was the manager of that ambulance company at that point, but still hourly.

So that was my jury experience, but I'd rather tell y'all the story of how I started working at that ambulance company, as it is a funny story & I did some risq'ue, risky, quirky things that ended up getting me a job there. This was in the 70's when I was HP's "house-mouse," and was not allowed to leave the house to even go to the mailbox because HP decreed it so, as I might seduce the mailman, or an innocent passer-by. But he wanted in with this ambulance company soooo badly that he had them pick me up at my house & take me to a party to meet everyone. What happened enroute on that non-emergency out-of-service ambulance full of EMTs an Medics is a funny story that will have to wait until later as it's crash time in Bubbaland. You'll dig the story. I could have got in sooooo much trouble. I could have gotten a perfect stranger in soooo much trouble, but neither of us got in trouble, & we made friends, & went to a great party, but THE DETAILS...the details are going to have to wait.

Optimistically preparing to hit the road for rounds...Hoping it will all be cool, and that I can be a bringer of smiles...OK, so that the fact that I have Rex on his leash will be the bringer of smiles. He's ready. He knows that it is Sunday & is anxious to get out & about & completes his K-9 duties. He makes it a promising endeavour...I have loved dogs all along, but never been able to utilize their unconditional love for such a worthy cause. Catch up with y'all as soon as I can...