When I grow up, I want to have as much fun and be as carefree as Ruth Gordon's "Maude," of "Harold and Maude" infamous cult classic of the 1970's.

So, here, now, what would Maude-In-Training (me) do if her MD looked at her intestinal hernia a few months ago, that he failed to diagnose the obvious. Long story, but I requested a follow-up visit and pointed out that he was incorrect in telling me this lower abdomen bulge were just the normal lumps and bumbs that come with middle age.

"Oh, yes. Well, you've got a hernia there. And you're going to need surgery pretty soon, as it's a pretty big one.

Never mind the scenic route we got here-here I am, out of a job and in need of a moderately important medical surgery pretty soon here...

After that first day of depression & minor panic, I believe Maude would get a grip (as I hope I have done) and started doing the footwork to get into the Veteran's Administration's network and start driving the hour and a half to either, Louisville, Indy, or Bloomington(clinic)and get myself in the system & get the sugery done there & a few other necessary procedures...get that all done before I go job hunting again. The mystery hernia has definitley been a contributory factor to me losing my job at WW-late x1, sent home in pain x1. worked in pain x3...it was not the only thorn in my side, just one of many, but now-it's important that I act.

And, spend down all my savings. And apply for food stamps, and see what they say about getting Medicaid, if I use the VA & find out all kinds of stuff I have no clue about, as a fire has been set under my buttinski, so-to-speak & action is a must.

There's a lot more drama going on in my family. I cry and pray and believe and hope and keep the faith. "Speaking words of wisdom...let it be.."

"There will be an answer, let it be..."

Bubba remains kind and supportive and always trying to cheer me up & tells me not to worry, we will get through all of this...

Family and friends in harm's way, and so I pray. I, myself, will be just fine. Maude would see it for the adventure that it is. I can do this. I am a lot stronger than I act.

early to bed, early to rise...Super Bowl Sunday for Bubba, kick back w/books, DVDs, email and blogstream for me tomorrow. The kind of way I like to spend my days.

more tomorrow